The power of mindful awareness and intention to replenish.

When I walked outside yesterday to sit in my favorite meditation spot, I was taken aback when I noticed that two beautiful shrubs that we had planted last year that had been thriving last month were now wilting, their leaves shriveled and turning brown. I don’t know how I had missed seeing this as I am out here all the time, yet somehow because they are tucked further back than some of the other shrubs, I must have walked right passed and not noticed them for quite some time. Thank goodness the water from my hose on and off over the course of the day was able to revive them — amazing to see them spring back to life with the right nourishment.

And yet, how often does this happen with ourselves? How often do we not pay attention to our own needs for replenishment, for “nourishment” of one kind or another, and days, weeks and sometimes months or more can go by before we realize what has happened. We might become depleted, lose a sense of vitality or energy, feel drained by the cumulative effects of stress, or feel disconnected from things that had previously enlivened us.

How Mindful Awareness Can Help

One of the things that I have found so helpful about practicing mindfulness is that we are not just cultivating a certain kind of paying attention on the cushion, but we are training ourselves to take this attention into our day-to-day so that we can begin to see more clearly in our lives. Mindfulness invites us to pay attention so that we can notice what mental and behavioral habits get in the way of our well-being, and so that we can intentionally move (often in baby steps), moment to moment, “toward the direction of greater ease of well-being.”

Whether or not you meditate, I want to offer you a simple practice to see what kind of nourishment your “inner life” needs. It combines learning to pay attention with intention to move in the direction of well-being. It is inspired by the practice of mindful awareness and also what psychologist Rick Hanson calls “taking in the good.”

Part One: How are you doing in there?

I often liken mindful awareness to the tool of a flashlight. We need a flashlight because we can’t change what we don’t see. If we remember to carry the “flashlight” of mindful awareness around with us throughout the day, and turn it on from time to time, it illuminates what is right here in front of us that we might otherwise miss in the automatic pilot busyness of the day and the natural mind-wandering we all experience, caught up in our mental thought streams.

One of the things we can pay attention to as we remember to turn the flashlight on is “how are we doing in there” — inside this body-mind-heart of ours? We can check in from time to time, the way my plants needed me to do, to notice what we might need and how we might continually orient toward ease of well-being. As you go through these questions you will have an opportunity in part two to consider: What might I do today and what might I do this week, and this month, that could be helpful?

The following are some suggestions for focusing your flashlight and seeing what is here, but feel free to come up with your own list:

• Physical self: How is your body feeling? Are you in need of some stretching, movement, relaxation, something to energize you? Is your body getting the right kind of “fuel” that it needs?
• Emotional self: How are you feeling? Can you name whatever emotions are present? Are you in need of connection, support, alone time? Is there something bothering you that would be helped by problem-solving, seeking advice, journaling, letting go?
• Creative self: When was the last time you nourished yourself creatively? Be curious how you bring creativity into your life and in what ways it enlivens you (e.g., cooking new meals, creating something with your hands, designing a garden, knitting a sweater, creating ideas at work).
• Spiritual self: What gives your life meaning and purpose beyond yourself and have you connected with this lately (e.g., helping others, contributing in some way, finding the sacred in the everyday, feeling awe in nature)?
• Behavioral self: Can you notice what behaviors you have engaged in recently and how they have been working for you? (e.g., too many late nights affecting my mood today; breakfast choice left me with a sugar crash; went for a short walk at lunch that was energizing).

Part Two: Moving in the direction of well-being

Once you do a mindful check-in as above, see if you might identify what kind of nourishment you are most in need of (just pick one thing and start small). Rick Hanson teaches the importance of not just noticing beneficial experiences but taking them in as a felt sense in the body to “enrich and absorb” them. I think of this like the difference between seeing a wonderful meal sitting on the table, versus eating it; unless you sit down and take it into your body, it will not nourish you.

Try this:

With whatever thing you picked that you are in need of:

1 – Look for what is already here in your day that you might be missing/not seeing or not accessing fully. For example, if you are in need of unwinding maybe there are moments to relax or recharge while driving home from work (something you are already doing) by regularly putting on some favorite music or inspiring podcasts. Or if you are in need of connection with the natural world perhaps you walk right past some beautiful plants each morning and you might make a point of pausing and savoring this experience, discovering what changes from day to day. Perhaps there are interactions throughout your day that involve caring exchanges and could be opportunities for feeling connection with others if you notice it as such. Take some time to enrich those experiences by staying with them and letting them sink in. (Don’t just look at the meal — eat it mindfully!)

2 – Look for ways to take small action steps for yourself to help you experience the “nourishment” that you need. For example, if you have a need for more movement, what would be different about your day if you spent five or ten minutes after waking up to do some gentle stretching, meditation, or walking outside? If you are in need of creativity what if you brought a little spark into your day by stopping at a local farm stand and creating a fun recipe with whatever you purchased, or decided to pull out your sketchpad after dinner instead watching TV as usual? If you notice those late nights haven’t been serving you, perhaps you make the decision to unwind with a cup of tea and be in bed early tonight and see how that feels. See if you might come up with something small you can do each day, something a bit larger you can do during the week, and perhaps something you can plan for in the month ahead that will nourish the need you have chosen to focus on.

Our choices and actions need not be momentous, but when they are done with intention and mindful awareness we can begin to nourish the needed parts of ourselves back to life.

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This article was originally published on Psychology Today.